Jan
07

1st Monday After Resolution Day


Reflection’s role when resolution rubber meets reality’s road

Do military folks even need to participate in the annual ritual of resolutions?

Surely habits formed just by virtue of military training and structure help members and even their families to find focus and determine strategy and steps to achieve goals. Simple, right?

To know how we want to show up to best to serve our families, careers and duties we might just need to schedule time to have some personal conversations with ourselves.  

We see it’s a timeless need in this repost below of Nate Brookshire’s 2017 piece in LinkedIn on the power of reflection. … … … HK, editor.

Active Reflection and Relevance ………...First published on January 15, 2017. Nate is currently serving on active duty and is the co-author of Hidden Wounds: A Soldier’s Burden

We are well into 2017 and most are finding out their initial resolutions are beginning to crack. Is there a better way? We can play semantics and focus on goals and start to measure every aspect of our lives but without a deep understanding of why our behaviors are having negative outcomes the end result will be the same. A common theme with successful coaches is to focus on personal accountability. 

Marshall Goldsmith, one of the world’s most renowned executive coaches has dedicated decades to facilitating growth in leaders at the highest levels of society. He is the inspiration for this discussion of a better way for 2017.

 As we navigate through life, we find there is always a new challenge or task to fill our time. When we become very successful in the short term we lose sight of the big picture and do not allow ourselves to appreciate the “wins” of life across time.  At the other side of the spectrum, if we experience a series of short term failures it begins to define us in a way that can become destructive. We frame our life through many lenses and unfortunately it is common to allow others to brand or label us in a certain way, many times using our short term wins and losses to construct a false narrative. Reflection is a method to take the multiple perspectives of our lives and construct a holistic picture. Once we have a better understanding of where we are in time and space only then can we develop the habits that best fit our vision of our best self.

 Life is messy. One only has to look at social media to realize we are in trouble. Civility is gone and the sheer volume of the rhetoric is masking incompetence on all levels. We fall prey to Fake News, pop psychology, and are bombarded with information that cannot be processed in time to separate agenda from fact. Greek philosopher Epictetus taught us, “It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.” The right attitude is key in setting the conditions for successful outcomes. Reflecting on 2016 will quickly give you a sense that life is fleeting and facing the challenges of today through being present, receptive, and joyful is a must. Not easy is it?

 Imagine we have mastered active reflecting while accepting the challenges that come our way. Is this enough to fulfill that nagging desire to make a difference? Stephen Covey, another coaching legend, offers the habit of “Begin with the end in mind.” His book, “7 Habits of Highly Effective People” is a must read for anyone seeking change that sticks.  By envisioning what a life well lived looks like to you coupled with an honest assessment of where you are hopefully will present an opportunity to experience real change. Continue to seek out and share positive habits, hold yourself accountable and build a community that enables your vision.

Marshall Goldsmith offers 6 DAILY questions to keep us accountable:

  • Did I do my best to increase my happiness?
  • Did I do my best to find meaning?
  • Did I do my best to be engaged?
  • Did I do my best to build positive relationships?
  • Did I do my best to set clear goals?
  • Did I do my best to make progress toward goal achievement?
HERE’s TO YOU in 2019

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