Jul
23

Valhalla Project’s Resident “Old Vet” Speaks on Veteran Isolation

“I feel like I’m all by myself, isolated with nobody to talk to. I never talk to my family or civilian friends about my experiences.They don’t understand and never will, so I just avoid the subject.”

 

Gordon Cucullu, Lt Col (Ret.), says he hears this repeatedly from contemporary vets. So often that he says it’s become a mantra. He wonders why this is such a universal phenomenon?

 

Korea 1970 Cucullu early service years

Korea 1970 Cucullu early service years

So, we give over WoW, our Words on Wednesdays today to the wisdom of the ‘old vet’ resident at the Valhalla Project. Valhalla is a place where warriors seeking respite, are enjoined to work with their hands in nature. There they find clean air and easier talk of their troubles and their triumphs, with others who understand, even if in just the sounds of side by side work in the wild. [Read more…]

Jul
16

EMDR Revolution author on process in writing healing trauma book

This follow on to last month’s WoW is being published while the author of The EMDR Revolution: Change Your Life One Memory at a Time – The Client’s Guide, continues her work on healing trauma under siren sounds that alert Israeli citizens of incoming missiles. 

EMDR Revolution for PTSD and other traumas in a guide book from the clients perspectiveToday’s Words on Wednesdays, notes what compelled and motivated Tal Croitoru, clinical therapist and researcher, to share the trauma healing methods she codified in her book. Her process as author is of interest to writers. The therapy itself, is ever more of interest to Military service members emerging from duty in conflict zones and to civilians also battling their own wars, within.

A guide and checklist on “How to know if one is receiving successfult therapy” in included in this post with the generous permission of our featured WoW author. [Read more…]

Jun
04

EMDR Revolution – a guide book on PTSD relief for clients

Ever hunted for help, when you’ve been pretty down and not yet out? Securing help when you need it most is a challenge, especially for invisible maladies like PTSD. Whether from military experiences or any of life’s trauma inducing situations, it’s tough to find help and to evaluate it when you are down or depleted.

EMDR Revolution for PTSD and other traumas in a guide book from the clients perspectiveIt’s why I instantly connected Tal Croitoru’s work to reader interests on MilSuccessNet. She is an accredited, EMDR practitioner, MSW and MBA and a doctoral researcher and lecturer and the University of Haifa.

Her guide book was written purposefully from the client’s point of view. This user friendly book helps people identify their challenges and also to envision what good help and health should look like. [Read more…]

Feb
23

Get over yourself n’ get along, civvy hubby told

A male, civilian spouse finishing up his advanced degree struggles to find his place within his Soldier wife’s family.  Suggestions and a gentle well placed kick of their veteran boots comes from Ft. Leonard Wood’s fine advice columnists, Pam and Shaun Collins. What do you think of their suggestions for the civilian fella’s attitude and their advice on how to manage a longer visit well?

Tyne out of place in the family set

Tyne out of place in the family set

READER Quandry: First, let me frame up my issue. When someone says, “your wife wears combat boots,” I take it as a compliment, because she is the Soldier and I am the spouse. I was never in the military, only a Family member.  While my wife is in the military, I have taken the last year to work on my doctoral dissertation. It requires a lot of hours, fieldwork, clinical studies and writing, re-writing and re-writing again.  [Read more…]

Feb
10

A look at leadership… from the business end

Your experiences moving through military to civilian workplace transitions may feel, at times, like you’ve landed on foreign turf. Expectations and modes of expressions seem strange. Leadership, a prized quality and understanding gained by military members, also seems to pass through foreign filters.

 

Glenn Llopis

Glenn Llopis

You are invited today to share with our community your thoughts. Does this corporate guide offered up by Forbes Magazine contributor, Glenn Llopis, measure up to Leadership as you experienced it during service?

The full article, minus photos and book links is reprinted for you below. About his work Llopis says, “I share the immigrant perspective on leadership and workplace innovation.” It feels right to offer this up to MilSuccessNet readers who have often expressed that transition back to ‘home base’ feels like a new culture and country.

Now.. in his own words, 15  locked in leadership coordinates… [Read more…]

Jan
31

Enlisted & M.A.S.H. Humor & Warrior roles

Enlisted! is on its critical 3rd air date after the pilot episode. Will it be chopped? Or, will it survive to serve up weekly TV fun to its military and civilian audience? Some might even hope the guffaws might bridge the gap between those camps.

cast of mashOne MilSuccessNet team member shares the impact of another, groundbreaking military themed show. It was an imperfect depiction that was somehow the right dose of military medicine to help heal America at the time.

That weekly ‘sitcom’ let us all pretend that one, older war was actively being fought in our living rooms. Meanwhile, so many veterans were just beginning to crawl out from under the crush of a much fresher war, and trying to find their way ‘home’. [Read more…]

Jan
08

Raab reviews book on hardest hit unit in Iraq war

With this week’s news on Iraq, questions on the cost of war are posed publicly, debated and discussed. Some are shared among the band of brothers who answered the call to duty there.

At the moment of contact, they are everything to each other. After the battle, the warriors are each other’s source of healing.

 Jonathan Raab

Jonathan Raab

In today’s Words on Wednesdays, Jonathan Raab, a veteran and military writer revisits the book MilSuccessNet posted in NovemberThey Fought For Each Other: The Triumph and Tragedy of the Hardest Hit Unit In Iraq by Kelly Kennedy. Published by St. Martin’s Griffin Press.

His book review follows…

[Read more…]

Dec
18

“5 Love Languages” book for the Military marriage

Holiday gatherings serve up delicate communication challenges. Between the dollops at the buffet are opportunities to show appreciation and even express love to those with whom we share meals and accomodation. It’s as good a time as any to note that while military families share all the fun and fretting that comes with the plans and preps, they’re also dealing with added variables to contend with over civilian settings.

Jocelyn Green family

Jocelyn and Rob Green

MilSuccessNet guest writer, Jocelyn Green, has addressed some of the unique communication challenges in a book she has co-authored with Gary C. Chapman. Dr. Chapman has authored a series of books on Love Languages.

This book is specific to the Military marriage and is adapted from the #1 New York Bestseller series by Gary Demonte Chapman on the concept of “Five Love Languages.”  The premise helps people speak and understand emotional love when it is expressed through one of five languages. Those categories are:  words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service or physical touch.

Chapman argues that while each of these languages is enjoyed to some degree by all people, a person will usually speak one primary language. That’s how they relate both giving and receiving love, and therefore connection.

So, if  you find yourself eyeing the folks you’re moving around the buffet table with as beings from another planet, chances are an understsanding of their love language might help. According to Chapman and Green, it often comes down to language, specifically says Chapman, “The primary emotional love language” that each person speaks. It can be confusing to the listener and a point of stress to the speaker who just doesn’t get why their message is not getting through.

We can imagine this dance of dialogues taking place in a military family – where there are strains and distances that really test a marriage and family unit. Where one faces dangers of combat thousands of miles away and the other mananges the homefront duties and all the decisions.

MilSuccessNet’s readers deal with unpredictable schedules, frequent moves and the challenge of reintegration.
This means stress in any one of the five branches of the military. We thought it apt to present this special resource that for many has helped navigate their relationships within a military marriage. At the very least, the title alone and knowing it’s out there, might shine a light on the more challenging spots in upcoming gatherings!
The book is based on input from dozens of military couples in all stages of their careers.
Check it out here:

According to the publisher’s notes, the Military Edition of  the Five Love Languages includes:

  1. Stories of military couples from every branch of service who have found ways to use the 5 love languages in their unique lifestyles
  2. A Decoding Deployments section at the end of each love language chapter, offering tips on how to express love when you are apart.
  3. A new chapter, Love Language Scramblers, explains how to speak the love languages
    through some of the most challenging times of a military marriage.
  4. An updated Q&A section to include questions specific to military marriage.

There’s also a 5 Love Languages profile to help partners identify their particular styles so that the principles can be put to work by readers.

We’re pleased to feature this book and to support the work of  award-winning author, former military wife and MilSuccessNet contributor,Jocelyn Green. Her books are known to inspire faith and courage in her readers through both fiction and nonfiction. She also has a loyal following world wide in her Faith Deployed ministry.

Real heroines on America’s home front, appear in her historical fiction novels. Widow of Gettysburg was highlighted in these pages on its launch.

Jocelyn Green, author (photo supplied)

Jocelyn Green, author (photo supplied)

Jocelyn graduated from Taylor University in Upland, Indiana, with a B.A. in English, concentration in writing. She is an active member of the Evangelical Press Association, Christian Authors Network, the Advanced Writers and Speakers Association, American Christian Fiction Writers, and the Military Writers Society of America.

She has posted tips for writers on this site and also tips on transition when she and her husband experienced that phase in his military career. Jocelyn and her husband Rob are raising their two small children in Cedar Falls, Iowa, where life post deployment and in transition flourishes and inspires others.

Read her tips for writers in MilSuccessNet archives HERE.

 

Gary ChapmanGary Chapman, PhD, is the author of the bestselling The 5 Love Languages® series, which has sold more than 8 million worldwide and has been translated into 49 languages. Dr. Chapman travels the world presenting seminars on marriage, family, and relationships, and his radio programs air on more than 300 stations. He lives in North Carolina with his wife, Karolyn.

Dec
11

Revisit notes success: Trio of transitions for army veteran, McKendree R. Long III

On this WoW, Words on Wednesdays at year end, we revisit and record new success in Mike Long’s story of transition from military member, to money manager to award winning writer.

Below you’ll find a revisit of Mike Long’s progress since we first published the rest of this post on September 25, 2013. Kudos and congratulations to Mike.

The Military Writers Society of American (MWSA) bestowed the 2013 Gold Medal, Historical Fiction on Long’s book: Dog Soldier Moon.

Recently accepted for publication is: Unfinished Business, for Cactus Country IV Anthology, Resurrection in Broken Promises Anthology and Choteau’s Crossing in Rough Country Anthology. And, his No Good Liked It Is just went live as an audiobook on Audible.com, iTunes, and Amazon.

On December 15-16, he’ll be signing books at the Mike Kent Gun Show,SC State Fairgrounds.

It’s inspiring to follow Mike Long’s progress in his 3rd career. Enjoy this MilSuccessNet REVISIT….. [Read more…]

Dec
09

Money Mondays goes smart seasonal shopping

 “Money Mondays” a new MilSuccessNet column, appeared here and immediately snagged attention and comments on LinkedIn, the business ‘social’ networking site.

Conversation in the town square I called on my friend and colleague, Alexei Schwartzman to help me plan this series on money for you well.  His specialized expertise in the financial industry will factor in future posts. For now, I’ll share his answer to my opening question: What is the best sequence for our community of readers to receive immediately applicable tips and solutions on their smart money moves?

“Your readers should become familiar with three key areas: Investment, Insurance and Taxes,” is what he said. 

I got instantly tired.

You and I KNOW this trio of ‘should know abouts.’ However, fatigue sets in fast as we try to stretch our finances over what seems like massive planning concepts. Alexei, must have recognized the look on my face based on the overwhelm he no doubt guides clients through in his practice. This is what I gleaned from our conversation and his explanations in gentle, human terms. [Read more…]